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Episode 40 – What Every Mom Needs To Know About Being An Empty Nester

What Every Mom Needs To Know About Being An Empty Nester - Alice Agnello

What does it take to prepare for being an empty nester?

Hey there Beautiful!

I have to tell you this story about my son because when he did it I said to him, “This is going to end up in a podcast episode,” to which he replied, “Whatever.” So by telling you the story I’m keeping my promise.

I’m at my computer last night working on this episode actually when my phone vibrates to tell me I have an incoming Facetime call. I immediately think, “Oh it’s gotta be my older son,” since he really is the only person who calls me using Facetime on a regular basis.

But as I pick up the phone, I see that the call is coming from my younger son, who is literally ten feet away from me in his bedroom since my empty nest is still full with one child. My desk is against the shared wall with his bedroom so if the wall wasn’t there, we could have a conversation. That is how close we are.

So this is what I have to deal with since my nest is not empty?

I answer the phone and say, “Really?” with my eyes in an exaggerated eye roll.

He replies, “Yes because I’m too lazy to get up.” At that point I think my hands came up, covered my face and I groaned with the silent plea of “How did I raise someone like this?”

His very important question to ask me was which color lava lamp to get for his room from Amazon. I could have yelled at him and said, “I’m in the middle of something and don’t bother me,” but I answered the phone.

That was my first mistake.

And really since I will have to look at said lava lamp in his bedroom I figured if he would listen to my opinion on not getting the horrid yellow color then I’m happy to give it.

After we hung up I just had to laugh.

And then thought how I’ve done that exact same thing by texting him when I’ve been in bed and also too lazy to get up, to see if he would go get applesauce from the pantry out in the kitchen.

But I will say that that was when I was sick with a stomach bug. I guess this is better than how we used to get our parents attention by screaming across the house at the top of our lungs, “MOM!” And we would keep shouting, “MOM!” until she finally responded.

So I guess texting and Facetiming from our phone is an improvement?

I’m going to pretend that I’m not the only parent with this problem.

If you want to share any of your experiences with lazy kids OR spouses, be sure to join my Facebook group, Kids Are Grown, NOW WHAT? Community.

We’re having a lot of fun in there and I don’t want you to miss out! Just go to my Facebook page and click on the VISIT GROUP button at the top of the page, answer the three short questions and join!

And while you’re there, like my page too. Now onto today’s episode!

How am I doing with habit stacking you may ask?

So back in episode 37 with Kim Barnes Jefferson, she shared her secrets of how to create habits that stick. In the interest of full disclosure one of the habits that has not stuck for me is the one I told you about at the end of the episode about putting lotion on my nails.

I tried to habit stack so whenever I had to get up to refill my water bottle, I was to also put lotion on my nails.

Well after about 3 weeks I decided, one, it didn’t seem to be helping and two, it was creating an anxiety that I didn’t want to have. I don’t know why but to see that I had to refill my water bottle and put lotion on my nails annoyed me.

So I gave up putting lotion on my nails.

But the habit that I’m happy to say is working is going back to the gym on the weekends. I go right when they open at 7 am, stay for about an hour to hour and fifteen minutes, and then I’m back home to eat breakfast and tackle the rest of my day.

I challenged myself at the beginning of January to do it until the end of January and so far I have. I know that I’m not going to stop since I’m feeling stronger and holy cow, I can see a teeny bit of definition in my arms.

Wahoo!!!

Being an empty nester can be a tricky transition but it doesn't have to be.

Now today’s episode I have a special treat for you.

This episode is actually Kim interviewing me all about what every mom needs to know about being an empty nester.

We talk about how to prepare yourself for an empty nest, if at all possible.

How to help prepare your children to become young adults when they leave for college and my trick to stay in touch with my younger son.

How to embrace yourself as just you and not the you that’s only a mom.

And we also discuss how to explore making new friends as an adult.

There is some language that might not be suitable for young children so be sure to pop in your earphones if you have little ones around.

What you will learn in this episode:

  • How to try and prepare yourself for an empty nest.
  • How to prepare your kids to be young adults.
  • My trick of how I stay in touch with my youngest son when he doesn't like to communicate as much as I want him to.
  • How to embrace your new role as just “you” and not just the “mom you” with your empty nest.
  • How to try and explore adult relationships and make new friends now that your nest is empty.

Links mentioned in this episode and how to work with Kim:

Thanks for listening!

Share your thoughts with me or ask a question about this episode. Send an email.

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Alice Agnello, Lifestyle and Success Coach

I'm Alice Agnello.

I’m a California raised, incurable romantic who was too snarky for the corporate world. I love show tunes, chai tea, and all things British. My mission? To help women rediscover who they are, after their kids have grown.

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I want the Guide!

Download the FREE guide to 5 Things You Can Do This Week To Help Find Yourself. You are ready to take this next step now that the kids have grown.

The guide will help you:

→  Work on your mindset so you can recognize negative thoughts and work to quiet them.

→  Help figure out what’s bothering you and know it’s okay to go at your own pace.

→ Understand that taking care of yourself is the most important person in your life and to release the guilt.

Sign up to receive my whitty newsletters, tips & tricks, promotions, & other emails, & receive this free guide!

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Before you go, get the Guide!

Download the FREE guide to 5 Things You Can Do This Week To Help Find Yourself. You are ready to take this next step now that the kids have grown.

The guide will help you:

→  Work on your mindset so you can recognize negative thoughts and work to quiet them.

→  Help figure out what’s bothering you and know it’s okay to go at your own pace.

→ Understand that taking care of yourself is the most important person in your life and to release the guilt.

Sign up to receive my whitty newsletters, tips & tricks, promotions, & other emails, & receive this free guide!