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Episode 67 – How To Help Your Teenager Figure Out Their Career Path – With Jay DuSold

How To Help Your Teenager Figure Out Their Career Path - with Jay DuSold

How do you help your teenager figure out their career path?

Hey there Beautiful,

‘Tis the season for back to school, in whatever form parents are choosing this year. What’s funny, yet not funny is when you go out to the stores in the United States, the stores don’t know whether to put out the back to school products, like pencil and pen cases, spiral notebooks, and backpacks, OR just skip to Halloween. 

So in the spirit of back to school and applying to colleges and universities this fall, have I got a treat for you! And I really wish I knew about my guest for today’s episode years ago to help with my children.

So who is Jay DuSold?

Today you’re going to meet Jay DuSold.

Jay helps teens accurately identify careers they'll love and stick with to avoid wasting their time, money, and life.

Can you imagine your child actually going to college and knowing what they want to do instead of taking a bunch of random courses trying to figure it out  for the first two years?

Jay’s incredibly passionate about his work since it eliminates the stress and anxiety of career confusion and enables his clients to avoid wasting money, effort, and years of bouncing around from one unfulfilling job after another, hoping to eventually get something they can at least tolerate. 

How To Help Your Teenager Figure Out Their Career Path - with Jay DuSold

He also loves seeing parents get peace-of-mind knowing that their child has accurately identified career fits and learned the process so they can repeat it over and over again if they want to continue exploring possibilities after the coaching finishes.

What you will learn in this episode:

  • The 5 Facets To Career DNA.
  • Why it's a good idea to step back and allow someone else to help your child when they’re confused about their career path.
  • Why there’s such a pressure to go to college.
  • What steps Jay will take to help your child figure out if college is right for them.
  • How career research will help your child understand what a potential job will really be like once they graduate from college.

And on a personal note about Jay: he’s been happily married to his junior high sweetheart for almost 26 years and has two incredible young-adult sons. He’s been working with teens for decades and absolutely loves this age. He thinks they're the best humans on the planet. Jay also loves connecting with people, traveling, spending time in feel-good spaces, and anything to do with his family.

And if you want to know more about Jay, all the ways you can contact him are below.

I’ll talk to you later, Beautiful!

Links mentioned in this episode and to contact Jay:

Did you miss this awesome episode about how to move forward in midlife? Click HERE to listen now!


Alice Agnello: Hey, Jay, thanks so much for being a part of the podcast today. I really appreciate it.

Jay DuSold: Alice. Thanks. It's great to be here.

Alice Agnello: So tell my listeners who you are and what you do because we connected in a mutual Facebook group. And as soon as I heard what he does, I wanted to have him on the show.

Jay DuSold: Yeah, super. So I'm actually a Team Career Guide and I basically help teenagers identify careers that they'll love and stick with before they even leave high school. So they don't go down a path where they're wasting time, money, effort, and really their life. So yeah, I work with young people exclusively and just help them figure out life after 12, basically.

Alice Agnello: And I can identify with this one because as a parent, meaning that I know. I went to college and I changed my major and I now wish I would have stopped and taken a moment and a breather to really figure out what I wanted to do. And I think that's why also I'm accepting of my son not going back to college at this point, my youngest son. And then trying to figure out what he wants to do and then, you know, go back or not go back. It just depends on what his career path is.

Alice Agnello: I was noticing that in talking to you, it's almost like as parents, we assume that the high school counselors are actually doing what you're doing. And I think that's a false assessment or because I feel like that's what I got maybe when I went to high school.

Jay DuSold: Okay.

Alice Agnello: But now I feel like counselors are more just the people who are there to help kids who are falling through the cracks and not actually counseling them on what their career path could possibly be, either going to college or not. Is that a fair assessment?

Jay DuSold: Yeah. I'm not all that familiar with what goes on in the high school level of career guidance. I just know from clients that I work with and as we're exploring the possibility of working together, I have some basic questions that I ask and I do ask them about resources that have been helpful. I ask them things about any types of career guidance they've received from school or assessments they may have taken and if they were helpful. And consistently what I hear back from students is that whether it was an assessment they took, or if it was something from school, that the guidance they receive really wasn't helpful.

Jay DuSold: So, that is definitely consistent. And I just actually spoke to a parent this week and they were referring to the high school experience of career guidance and their opinion was that the school counselor, some of them are just well intentioned and they really want to help, but they're just so overwhelmed. There's so many students to work with. So I think, I'm sure there are people in that position that are really passionate about helping young people. But part of the issue is just their workload and how many students they have to try to help. But yeah, unfortunately I would say in my experience of doing this since 2014, there's a consistent expression of that the high school guidance, not really helping all that much.

Alice Agnello: Do you find that more when they parents come to you, are they at a loss of what to do next? Or are they really trying to think about what could help their son or daughter move forward in deciding whether or not to go to college?

Jay DuSold: Yeah, that's a great question. So usually when parents find me and we initially connect, they're definitely frustrated because they want to help. They care about their teenager and they see the fallout of the confusion with their son or their daughter. That they see that they're confused, they're stressed, they're worried, they're feeling apprehensive about moving forward, which then translate of course, into those internal things take expression. So relationships are strained, all sorts of fallout.

Jay DuSold: So parents are definitely seeing that with with their teenagers and they're frustrated because they don't know how to help. They don't know what to do. Again, I have a Facebook community of parents who have young people, teenagers who are really struggling with career direction. I ask a few questions when they come into the group and one of them has to do with what's your biggest concern? And what's frustrating you most about the process of helping, of you helping them? And they'll say, "I just don't know what to do. And we've done assessments, we've tried this, the answers that come out of those really aren't helpful. And I just don't know what to do. And we are concerned about wasting time, wasting money. We just don't know what to do." So absolutely. I absolutely find that consistently with the parents that I work with.

Alice Agnello: Because I feel that the year has been an increased pressure on going to college. And that's not always the 100% solution for every single child. I dealt with this with one son, definitely knew his path and then my younger son is still trying to figure that out. And I even told him, I said, "You don't have to go to college if you don't want to." But I felt like he, there was a pressure from friends. There was a pressure maybe from the outside or social. I couldn't figure out where he was getting it from. But where does that come from? Just everywhere?

Jay DuSold: Yeah. Oh man. Yeah, this is extensive. So I'll try to keep it brief, although brevity is not my strong point. Yeah. So I think there's three primary sources of this, the shaping influence and this, college is always the best route, mindset. So I think it comes from society at large. So our culture basically is telling young people like, "Hey, you'll always be better off earning a degree, even if you're not sure what to major in or exactly how you'll apply it. Just get to college and you'll figure it out. In the process, you'll earn a degree and you'll be better off." And that's just not true anymore. I mean, that's a super antiquated way of thinking, but it still permeates the general career advice that's out there in pop culture.

Jay DuSold: So I think pop culture is one source. Another source is from the schools themselves. I recently heard someone say that high schools aren't really about preparing young people for life after 12th. They really, they become college prep institutions. And so, having two of own sons, they're now 20 and 22, having gone through that. Definitely experienced that pressure from high school itself as an institution. It's really all about preparing kids to go on to college not to just determine what's really the best path for you from this point forward.

Jay DuSold: And then, the other pressure is definitely parents. I think that parents have again, that antiquated paradigm where they really have bought into this idea that, "Hey, my kid's going to be better off. There'll be more hireable, they'll have a higher salary potential, and they'll be less likely to be let go, to be fired if they're a degree holder. And again, that's just not true today. But yeah, so those three ways, Alice, I think, are the primary directions from which this pressure comes. From the high schools, from the collage at large, and then from parents as well.

Alice Agnello: And what I like about what you do, Jay, is that you're focusing on the child instead of the parent. I mean, this is one of those steps as a parent, that you really have to put your faith and trust in someone and then step way back to allow the process to actually occur. Because up until that moment as a parent, it's your over your child protecting and pushing and doing this and directing. And then finally, as you said, there comes a point where I don't know what you want to do. I can't figure that out. I think I know what you'd be good at, but a parent telling their child, this is what you're good at, the child is just going to run for the hills because once again, my mom is telling me what to do. And so when you start with a child that usually you are getting them right before like 16, 17, 18, is that where you fall?

Jay DuSold: Yeah, pretty much. If I'm talking with the parents, I usually encourage them to really think about whether or not their son or daughter is really feeling the impact of career confusion. And that's really a telltale sign that I'd be someone good to come alongside them and work with them. It's not really so much age. It really has to be, does the young person really feel the fallout of having career confusion, because if they feel that, then they're going to be more likely to really want to solve that.

Jay DuSold: My approach takes work. So there's quite a bit of work in between sessions. And if a young person's really not feeling the weight of the confusion and lostness, they're not going to be as apt and inclined to actually put a 100% in and do the work. But yeah, right around 15, 16, 17, that's typically the age of the young people that I whined up at working with.

Alice Agnello: And then I noticed that you focus on five facets of a Career DNA. Can you explain what that is?

Jay DuSold: Yeah, sure. So Career DNA is just a little phrase I use to capture this idea of an internal code, right? Because we think of biological DNA and we're like, yeah, that's kind of like an internal code that programs us for our external features, our physical features like hair color, eye color, all that stuff. So I think it's a good analogy to help us quickly grasp the concept.

Jay DuSold: Oh yeah, Career DNA's an internal code that establishes how a young person is wired for success, satisfaction and motivation. Okay. So there's five facets of Career DNA. And so the first is what I call enjoyed abilities. So these are the things that a teen is really good at, but they also enjoy doing. The second aspect of Career DNA is what I call subject matter. And that's just the stuff that someone likes to work with on or through.

Jay DuSold: So it could be things like numbers, or ideas, or words, or people, or physical objects. The third element of Career DNA is what I call the motivational context or the motivational environment. And that starts getting into a person's intrinsic motivation, both the things that will trigger that, trigger them into action, but also sustain them in the process of working. And so both are really important. Intrinsic motivation is such a powerful factor in finding a career that you'll love and stick with, because if it doesn't have the elements that trigger and sustain your motivation, well, you're going to feel greatly dissatisfied.

Jay DuSold: So Career DNA is looking at all the elements that are part of how a person's wired to have their motivation triggered and sustain. The fourth element of Career DNA is what I call the operating relationship. And that's the relationship that people take with other people when they're in the process of achieving, that's really ideal for them, that puts them in their sweet spot. For some people they need to be alone. So their operating relationship would be by themselves, no one's around. Some people are on the other end of the spectrum, where they need to be in a team or a context working together, collaborating.

Jay DuSold: And then the fifth component of Career DNA is what I call the payoff. And that's the end result of someone's efforts that they look for, that will make them feel really fulfilled and satisfied with their work. So examples of a payoff could be things like working through clear steps to a finished process, an end result and so that's very mechanical. But someone who's wired that way, they need to be in a job, in a career that allows them to move sequentially through clear steps to an end result.

Jay DuSold: At the other end of the spectrum could be someone that really doesn't look for that at all. What they look for is making an impact. What they're doing actually has a clear, visible result, or they can make an impact. So again, you see, depending on where someone falls on that spectrum, they would look for a very different type of career because their payoff is very different. So that's it in a nutshell, but it's those five dynamics of the Career DNA, which is that internal code that helps establish how a person's wired for success, motivation and satisfaction.

Alice Agnello: Because as a parent, as you're listing those off, I can see things in my children. Yep, crosstalk he's there, he's good for that kind of stuff. But then on the flip side, as someone who could be, I'm a boss, you know what I mean? Those are the things that I would want to know about an employee to then help motivate them and succeed in their job. Because as a boss you, not the word govern, but you can't give directions all the same to the same person.

Jay DuSold: That's awesome.

Alice Agnello: So just like going through the process as a child or a young adult to know more about themselves at that point, I would think would help them succeed. Whether they go to college, where they don't. They take a break, they just work in a restaurant for a little while. I think sometimes children have to go through that to learn the lessons more than a parent could ever just say, "Well, you'll do nothing if you just go work at a restaurant."

Jay DuSold: Yes, that's for sure.

Alice Agnello: And like, guess what, think? They don't learn that stuff themselves. There's no way that you can't allow them to learn those life lessons unless they actually get out there and do it.

Jay DuSold: Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, I love what you said Alice, about using the findings of someone's Career DNA as a boss or as a manager. And the work I do has applications in many different fields. Yeah, sometimes it's used in corporate and executive levels for things like you're saying, is to take managers and help them understand their people so that they can bring out the best in them. And so there's application for adults.

Jay DuSold: I chosen to bring this work to young people. It's part of my backstory. And so it's funny because as I started doing this coaching work with teenagers, I would meet parents, obviously that were connecting with me and they're like, "Oh my God, does that work for someone like me? Because I still haven't figured it out and I'm 42. And actually I was getting so many inquiries that I created a whole separate program for adults. I don't promote it and I don't really push it, but it's there so and ask, but my focus is teenagers.

Jay DuSold: But to your point, when someone understands these five elements of their design, oh my gosh, I mean, it's so super helpful for young people to get on a right path early. But for older or in career people to maybe learn exactly like, why am I dissatisfied in this position? What are the misalignment pieces? Which then actually allows them to do some tweaking things, to help better align aspects of their job that do have some flexibility. But, you can't know what needs to be aligned if you don't first know where the misalignment is, right?

Alice Agnello: And then to know that as a young person and eventually get better at recognizing that as they move through their career path, to then have a confidence to communicate with your manager, "Hey, just to let you know, I work better this way." Now if this isn't going to work, I'll try and find something else to do or transfer me to a different department. But just to have that knowledge and eventually get that confidence to communicate is a huge boost for that young person.

Jay DuSold: Yeah. That's so good that you're saying it. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. This is awesome. Yeah. So what's cool is, when I help clients understand their Career DNA through the assessment tool that I use. And then I show them how to find careers that would align with how they're wired in those five aspects. One of the things that we talk about is the concept of career fit and you won't find something that's a 100% fit and that's okay.

Jay DuSold: But part of my coaching involves giving them seven tweaking strategies because the career that we're exploring in the coaching, that's identified as a really good fit for them. Before they even get into it we're able to see, okay, now, if you do decide to pursue this position, here are the things that aren't like a super full alignment with aspects of your design. But that's okay because here's seven different strategies you can apply to better align them. So they go into that with an awareness that, okay, hey, I'm heading into this. It's overall a really good fit for me. There's some elements that aren't a great alignment, but I have some options that I can apply to actually better align those.

Jay DuSold: And that does include, I actually tell them, show them how to speak to a supervisor or a manager to say, hey, I've done a lot of self assessment work. And I know this about myself, and I know this is an element of this position. That's not a perfect alignment, but I had some ideas of how I can be even more motivated, more engaged and more productive if we can make this little adjustment. And so it's such an empowerment for them to know the stuff that's going to grind on me, or that's going to cause areas of feeling like, I just hate this part. Like, I can know why, and I can actually do something about it. It's super empowering. Yep, for sure.

Alice Agnello: Now I'm curious if you could share with us one of your students that figured it out, what the path would be for them and then how to confirm that path. Meaning that like, so if you've got a young person who has all the indicators are, they would be good at, let's say chemical engineering and they haven't even gotten to that point yet at, to apply or anything like that. But what are some, not tests, but just additional indicators that you can help that child with to then show them that yes, this is probably what you want to do.

Jay DuSold: Yeah, sure. That's a great question. So the assessment tool that I use, it gives us all of the data that we need. So that assessment tool and that's phase one of the coaching and it's called Discover Your Design. And that's where we identify those five aspects of their Career DNA. And so once we have that information and then we're able to move into phase two, which is called Find Your Fits. And so that's when we take the data that we get back from the assessment and I call it their pattern.

Jay DuSold: So we're able to look at their Career DNA and their pattern and then I show teenagers how to find careers that would actually be a good fit for you. So we do an initial surface level fit assessment, and we get a handful of career positions that look like it'll be a good fit. And then they pick one and we do a really deep dive fit analysis where we go into each of those five categories and we do a thorough career research on the position. And so basically, those five categories of Career DNA are used to get information about the career position.

Jay DuSold: So enjoyed abilities is the one category for the student in Career DNA. So we research the career position to find the abilities that they will actually be using that are critical for success in that position, right? We look at subject matter, what is it that this young person really enjoys working with, on or through? Well, the research that we do allows them to discover, what is the subject matter? The things I'll be working with, on or through in this position, right?

Jay DuSold: So we go through all five of those and they actually build a career profile through research that allows them to learn those five aspects of the career position. Which then can be compared directly to those same five aspects of their Career DNA, their wiring. And then we assess how much of a fit is here.

Alice Agnello: Because I'm thinking if someone was interested in, let's say nursing for one thing like that looked like they were going to be down that path. There are definitely some specifics in that job that are going to be successful. You do need to like to deal with people, you know what I mean? And think on your feet.

Jay DuSold: Sure.

Alice Agnello: And I mean, there's of course the whole science background and taking blood and that kind of stuff. And a lot of it would be, I would think, a little bit monotonous in the sense...

Jay DuSold: Sure.

Alice Agnello: ...that some of those duties every single day. But then there's also the thrill of helping someone and saving someone and that type of a thing. And so would you, like when you're doing the research, what is that child, maybe going to go and do? Talk to a nurse or how do they get into that space?

Jay DuSold: Yeah. That's okay. Yeah. So how do they do the research? How do they really figure that stuff out? Okay. Yeah. So, there's five strategies that we use for career research. So one is basically just online research that you can easily accomplish online. So things like career info websites. So there are websites that are designed just to provide this kind of information and data on specific career positions.

Jay DuSold: This is an often overlooked one but if you go to job posting sites, let's say, someone's thinking about becoming a veterinarian. So going to a job posting site and looking up jobs as a veterinarian, that's extremely valuable because you're learning from actual employers what they're looking for. They'll tell you, "Hey, you have to be able to do this. You need to have this skill. You need to have this ability. This is what this position entails."

Jay DuSold: So I love the whole aspect of the job listing sites, because it's not just all kinds of random data as some of these info sites can be, but we're really hearing from an actual employer, who's trying to hire real people. So you get a real specific sense of what the position is all about. So the online stuff, and then just Googling the day in the life of a veterinarian. What the veterinarians do all day? Just online stuff is great. Then there's things like informational interviews. So I have my clients, they have to book five informational interviews, talk to five different people, practicing professionals in that field. And they ask questions, not random questions, but they ask questions so that they can learn those five elements about the career.

Jay DuSold: Because again, remember, we're trying to align the information we learned about the position with the five categories we've learned about them. And so informational interviews then there is shadowing, which is just tremendous. Then there are things like volunteering, is a great way to really get familiar with a position. There's things like summer camps, not like the ones when we were a kid, like the Brady show.

Alice Agnello: Yeah.

Jay DuSold: Now there's occupational camps and a lot of universities now are hosting veterinarians camp. I mean, it's crazy. You can do a Google search on veterinarians camp and you'll find summer camps all over the country to help kids get oriented toward the field of veterinarianism. So camps is another great one. Yeah.

Jay DuSold: So, those are the basic things, but that's a guided process that I bring my clients through to do all of that research. And then we have a culminating collection piece that we use to record everything and put that all in an order so they can very easily see how the position and what they've learned actually aligns with what we've learned about them.

Alice Agnello: What I think is great about this process is it really gets the child to think outside the box, use the skills that they know how to use. Google and searching and research online. But then also, it forces them to participate actually in the process. Meaning, I have to speak to five different people and actually go out there in an interview. And that's stuff that kids usually that age are not doing at all. Which is what I love is that they're actually gaining even more skills that will help them in the future by just going through that process.

Jay DuSold: Yeah. Yeah, that's awesome. It's funny you say that. I have a client right now, he's a young guy, a super capable young man. And he said, "Hey, I have a chance. I have to get a summer job." And he's like, "What we're discovering is looking like this kind of field is really ideal for me. Where we're still early in the process." He said, "But instead of going to just get a job at a fast food place, I was thinking about getting a job at this electronics place near my house, a small mom and pop shop."

Jay DuSold: And so to your point, Alice, he is thinking differently now about opportunities because he's realizing, things now in high school that I can do can count. And I'm helping him create, actually to create his own job position there, because they're not hiring, but to create a job position and to pitch it to the owner.

Jay DuSold: So we're actually in that right now. He reached out for additional help and when I contract with my clients, I'm like, "Hey, you guys have me 24 seven, not only for the official work, but if something comes up, an opportunity and I can help you." I mean, some of these young people are amazing. That's why I love young people. If they have the right context and they have someone in their corner and helping them, young people are amazing.

Jay DuSold: Because they're idealists and they're full of energy and passion and this young man, he's going for it. We're actually in the process of crafting this job. I showed him how to do that and he's working on it and I'm so excited. But to your point, he's thinking outside the box and he's willing to implement some skills that maybe he wouldn't have been thinking about just a month ago. So it's really cool. Really awesome stuff.

Alice Agnello: So now I'm curious. So that gentleman's mom, dad, parent figure, are they amazed that he's doing that? Like, are they shocked that he's doing that? Or is that what he's been that way? Does that make sense?

Jay DuSold: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, honestly he's probably, he's a pretty high capacity guy. So what the parent did say was they were just so surprised and glad that he's pursuing it. So I don't think they were shocked. Again, like I said, he's a studious young man. He's oriented toward those things. He's a sharp guy, but some of it's just being funneled now in a direction that can be super advantageous for him. And I told him to, and I'm a big proponent of... Really, it's part of what I do in my coaching, Alice, is I look at these young people like men and women. I don't treat them like children. I don't call them kids.

Jay DuSold: In fact, I think the concept of adolescence has been one of the most damaging things that we've done to young people. There really is no such thing as an adolescent. It's a category made up by a behavioral psychologist many years ago. But anyway, so I think just, I speak to these young people like they're young adults and their capacity level is high and I say that about them.

Jay DuSold: But I told this young guy, I said, "Hey, you know what? Think about all these people that you're networking with now as that, a network. You're 15, 16, but you're starting to build your network. And if you go to this guy and you pitch the job and you get it, even if you don't, but you have them now in your contacts, so to speak. He's part of your network.

Jay DuSold: And at 15 you're building a network that can really be super advantageous to you as you move forward into the career future. So I love throwing that out there to the young people I work with, as well as helping them see this as much bigger than just the here and now. But as seeing what they're doing is work that really contributes to a great network for the future.

Alice Agnello: Because I had the attitude that when my eldest was in as a junior, so that I had him for two more years. And so I felt like I had to put in as much knowledge into his brain and share it as possible. So that he could still be a functioning adult as is, but also as he moved out, that I had done as much as I could as possible to do that. But also I know that what you're doing is separate from what the parent's role is. And sometimes you need that separation in there because a child needs to listen to someone else and see it in a different way and view the world in a different way. And know that someone else is in their corner trying to help them throughout this whole entire process.

Jay DuSold: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I've had that experience as you have reflected in your own parenting. I've had the process or the situation where my wife and I will be working on something when our kids were a little bit younger, they were teenagers, and just trying to really help them grasp and important basic life principle. And maybe we weren't seeing receptivity that we would like or application of it.

Jay DuSold: And then they would have been out or at youth group or some other thing they were involved in and they would have heard another adult say the same thing, okay. And they would come home and be like, "Oh, I heard this awesome thing." Like, "Really, what was it?" And they'll tell us. And we're like, inside we're saying, that's exactly what we've been saying.

Jay DuSold: Why wasn't it awesome when we were saying it. But I think to your point, it's super helpful to have people around us that we trust to really help speak into the lives of our teenagers. They need it, they really do. I hear that from parents a lot. They're like, "Hey, I've tried to have this conversation. I've tried to say, hey you know you're 16, 17. We should probably think about career future." And they'll say, "But they just totally shut me out." Or like, there's no movement on that conversation. So, "Hey, if there's anything you can do to help, great."

Jay DuSold: And then of course we get working together and the young person opens up. So I think having advocates as parents in our corner that are about the same thing can be really helpful. It doesn't mean that we're a bad parent. It doesn't mean we haven't done our job, but we all experience that. Sometimes hearing it from someone other than mom and dad, it is super helpful for sure.

Alice Agnello: Jay, this has been so great. I really hope that people listen and will understand and just have taken away some good tidbits from you today.

Jay DuSold: Thanks, its been awesome [inaudible 00:33:15].

Alice Agnello: Is there anything that I didn't touch on that you would like to make sure that we close with at all?

Jay DuSold: I would just encourage parents to just be careful about putting expectations from the culture, or maybe even your own expectations on your teenager. Just really help them understand how they're wired and then really champion them into finding life work that aligns with their design. Finding life work that they'll be able to be successful in and flourish in and feel satisfied and feel happy. And that usually involves having that backup and give them some space to do that. So that would be my main encouragement to parents as they're listening. Yep.

Alice Agnello: No, I completely can take that now that I am not in the thick of it, I guess, as they say.

Jay DuSold: Figuring it out on the other side.

Alice Agnello: So yes, exactly. But I think that's fantastic advice in all respects. So I have three questions that I end all of my interviews.

Jay DuSold: Okay.

Alice Agnello: So first one, tell me something that not a lot of people know about you.

Jay DuSold: Oh wow, okay. A lot of people don't know that I was struck by a vehicle driven by someone who was intoxicated when I was seven years old. Yeah. I had purchased ice cream from the ice cream man. He used to come down our one way street. I lived in a small beach neighborhood and I purchased ice cream and I began to walk to cross the street back to my home. And I did look both ways as I was taught at my age, it was hard to determine how fast the car is moving. And this guy was speeding. He was intoxicated. And I went across the street and I never made it. I wound up in a hospital having been hit by a car. So yeah, a lot of people actually don't know that part of my story.

Alice Agnello: All I can say is, wow. Yeah, I would not have thought that, that's what you would say.

Jay DuSold: Yeah.

Alice Agnello: That's fantastic that you were able to survive all that.

Jay DuSold: Yes, thankfully. Yeah, thankfully.

Alice Agnello: Name three things that you can't live without, other than your friends and family.

Jay DuSold: Wow, all right. Okay, so definitely good food is high on the list. I would say that's definitely something I probably could not live without. Good food is a big part of my life and the community that I'm in, my family. We love good food. Thankfully, my wife is always just making something incredible. Good food, let's see, music. Music is a second thing that's like, I really couldn't live without it. It has such a dynamic in our family. Not only we listen and enjoy, but both of our sons are musicians. So music is a big part of our family. And I would have to say like my faith, my faith in God, and my relationship with God is a super huge part of who I am. And that would be something I definitely would not live without. So yeah, food, faith, and music, for sure. Those are my three and I'm sticking to it.

Alice Agnello: If you could choose, okay, since you're a lover of music, one song to play every time you entered a room for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Jay DuSold: Oh man. Well, I'm about positivity and I think probably historically, second to none, the most upbeat vibe piece of music is Bob Marley's Everything Going to be Alright. If I could enter a room, that would be the song that I would want blasting as I came in. Giving people hope and encouragement and being entering on a positive note, uplifting spirit. For sure.

Alice Agnello: I could definitely see that. And I could definitely, I just imagine myself blasting it in the kitchen.

Jay DuSold: There you go. Well, do as your day blast.

Alice Agnello: I'll just do it exactly.

Jay DuSold: I love it. I love it.

Alice Agnello: Thank you so much, Jay, for being a part of a podcast. What's the best way for someone to get ahold of you?

Jay DuSold: Yeah, so probably, I imagine parents are probably listening, not teenagers.

Alice Agnello: Very true.

Jay DuSold: Okay. Yeah. So probably lifeafter12th.com. The website is probably the best place, life after the number 12 and then TH, lifeafter12th.com. That would probably be the best place. I have a little button on there where parents can schedule a chat. And I love talking to parents about this stuff. I mean, even outside of getting clients and doing my coaching. So, I mean, if I can give you 30 minutes to connect with you, hear your story, help you figure things out, learn more about what I do. I love connecting with people. And so, yeah, the website is probably the best stop and that's the best place for people to find me.

Alice Agnello: Awesome. Thank you so much, Jay.

Thanks for listening!

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Alice Agnello, Lifestyle and Success Coach

I'm Alice Agnello.

I’m a California raised, incurable romantic who was too snarky for the corporate world. I love show tunes, chai tea, and all things British. My mission? To help women rediscover who they are, after their kids have grown.

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→  Work on your mindset so you can recognize negative thoughts and work to quiet them.

→  Help figure out what’s bothering you and know it’s okay to go at your own pace.

→ Understand that taking care of yourself is the most important person in your life and to release the guilt.

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Download the FREE guide to 5 Things You Can Do This Week To Help Find Yourself. You are ready to take this next step now that the kids have grown.

The guide will help you:

→  Work on your mindset so you can recognize negative thoughts and work to quiet them.

→  Help figure out what’s bothering you and know it’s okay to go at your own pace.

→ Understand that taking care of yourself is the most important person in your life and to release the guilt.

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